Kamala vs. George “The Animal” Steele – Jungle SQUASH!

Kamala

I think everyone ’round these parts knows of my affinity for the legendary Prime Time Wrestling. Hosted most famously by Gorilla Monsoon and my hero Bobby “The Brain” Heenan, what was once the flagship show of the World Wrestling Federation featured primarily one-sided affairs that would be indeed prime for this here column. Imagine my surprise when I learned my good friend (and co-author) Bryan Alvarez was doing a short run reviewing PTW. Why this was just delicious – now I had an excuse to start going back and watching Prime Time for what had to be the 93rd time. And when I heard they were about to experience THIS MATCH…

…I realized it had yet to make an appearance at WrestleCrap.com! Time to rectify that immediately.

Kids what you see above is one George “The Animal” Steele staring down Kamala “The Uganda Headhunter.” If you’re looking at that today and thinking, “Wow, that is some stereotypical racist crap right there”, trust me, I won’t argue the point. Even in the 1980s it was pretty clear this was over the line. So I am not condoning this, but rather just pointing out that this was a weekly occurrence on national television in the 80s.

George, for his part, was a nearly mute madman. Almost an animal you might say. Despite this he was clearly billed as being from Detroit, Michigan. Maybe he inhaled too many fumes at the Ford factory, I dunno.

So the bout starts off with both men doing each other’s mannerisms, with Kamala flailing his arms and George slapping his belly. Truth be told, I laughed way too hard at this and if you were around to witness either man in their prime, I am guessing you did as well.

Kamala attempts to intimidate The Animal by showing off his athleticism, namely by jumping into the air and touching his toes. Steele backs up a step or two, but then comes in at Kamala, causing the big guy to hide in the ropes.

More sizing up follows, with George eventually checking out Kamala’s body paint. And by “checking out” I do mean tasting it. Hope it wasn’t lead!

Now if you’re thinking we’re a good five minutes in and there’s been literally no real action by either guy, you’d be right. So here’s George with the first offensive maneuver of the bout…as he steps on Kamala’s bare toes. High spots, baby!

Seeing that things aren’t going his man’s way, Kimchee hops up on the apron to distract George. This allows Kamala an opportunity to grab a gimmick and whack Steele in the throat.

He then rolls his own body closer to the corner where Kamala is waiting to give him a TOP ROPE SPLASH. And that was NOT the kind of thing you saw all the time from a guy that big back in the mid 1980s, believe me. Originally, I was debating whether this should be a SQUASH of the Week or an INDUCTION and even when I was nearly at the finish I was still debating it. However a voice called out to me with the answer. A voice from BEYOND THE GRAVE. The voice of the late, great Gorilla Monsoon who called the finish thusly. Thanks, Gorilla. Now go back to arguing with Bobby up there on high!

Discuss This Crap!