Someone Bought This: L.J.N teases us with their King Haku card

11 Submitted by on Wed, 04 March 2015, 02:00

Haku figure Does Not Come WIth Crown As Illustrated

Longtime Crappers will remember the above image from the back of a Bill Apter magazine.

The L.J.N Haku did in fact not come with crown as illustrated.

But you know the worst part?

I was browsing this Wrestling Card Collection Page, and I found a page listing all the L.J.N cards that were on the back of the cardboard backings for the figures.

…and look what I found! Look at the picture of Haku they decided to use on the card that came with the Haku figure (which I’ll remind you did not come with a crown!)

Haku card from LJN figure

What is that thing perched upon his noggin in that picture?

Why yes, it is in fact a crown!

I swear these sadists at L.J.N are just teasing us with this stuff!

But it’s okay, because years later Jakks finally did the right thing and released a King Haku figure WITH CROWN!

King Haku Jakks figure

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11 Responses to "Someone Bought This: L.J.N teases us with their King Haku card"
  1. JustAGuyGuy says:

    TO HAKU!

  2. Drew says:

    This card can gouge out your eyeballs, pull out your front teeth and bite off your nose. Great fun for the kids!

  3. John C says:

    The Haku figure is so tough that not only did he lay a beating on Ken doll but made him watch as he did it with Barbie. And kept the crown on his head the entire time. TO HAKU!!!

  4. Vealchop says:

    But did it come with Jesse Barr’s eye?

  5. Sean Bateman says:

    All hail King Haku, King of Wrestlecrap!

  6. Geoff says:

    The card can gouge out your eyeballs, pull out your front teeth and bite off your nose. The action figure? (notice I said action figure and not doll) Not as much fun. The figure just stood there and you had to make it move by swinging its arms or moving its legs. It’s expression was always the same and always looked P.O.ed. You might want to be careful of the crown though because it can poke out your eyeballs which is different than gouging out eyeballs. But instead of it doing it too you, you had to work to make it do it to you. Why don’t they keep these newfangled contraptions away from our kids.

    ON the plus side it came at the increbly low price of $29.99. And in the first 10 minutes of calling, you get a free Bobby the Brain Heenan action figure as well. It could speak and tell you that it was in fact smarter than you. You also got a small wrestling ring for free for buying two King Haku figures and getting two Bobby the Brain Heenan action figures. One for you and one for your partner/significant other (if you happen to have one after the fact that you like wrestling). It didn’t slice, dice, chop, mince, saute or anything like that (the card did though) it did in fact, just stand there looking scary. You could use the crown to mix or pick your teeth (just keep it away from your eyeballs unless you are inclined in that direction. For use on yourself or on others). Call today. This offer is good for a limited time.

  7. AK says:

    What about that sweet cape? I’m pretty sure he got more action that Wilt Chamberlain and John Holmes combined by wearing it.

    TO HAKU!

  8. Down With OPC says:

    That crown looks like a pineapple, Meng!

  9. Anonymous says:


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