He’s looking in your windows.
*The Stalker*
He’s following you around town.
*The Stalker*
He’s calling you constantly, but hangs up before he says a word.
*The Stalker*
——————–
Now doesn’t that sound exciting? What could be more fun than a crazed lunatic stalking the hot ladies of the WWF? The angles that could have been done with Sunny alone would have made for nail biting melodrama.
So leave it to the WWF to come up with a cool name for a completely uncool, boring character. No, this Stalker, as portrayed by veteran Barry Windham in his the 1990’s, wasn’t nearly that intriguing.
Instead, the Stalker we got was a much kinder, gentler stalker, who was actually more of a game hunter. And not even a big game hunter (which might have been interesting…ok, probably not, but it couldn’t have sucked any more than this). Nah, this guy just went out hunting deers and rabbits! How exciting is that?
Vignettes were filmed of Windham decked out in camoflage and fumbling around in the woods. Fans were expected to be in awe as the Stalker would magically appear in the foilage, where previously there was just a big, man shaped bush. Big Barry would then mumble possibly the dumbest catchphrase of all time, followed by a mysterious voice that would whisper “The Stalker” as a Predator-esque special effect made the words disappear from the screen. Oh yeah, and he came from possibly the dumbest hometown ever, “The Environment”. And we thought WCW Special Forces was bad!
It was all quite silly, of course, so it should come as no surprise that The Stalker lasted just a handful of matches. Perhaps Windham discovered that the camoflage didn’t hide his ever-growing gut, and the only thing that was disappearing was any charisma he had left. He quickly departed the WWF, only to return later as one half of the equally appalling New Blackjacks with fellow WrestleCrapper Justin “Hawk” Bradshaw.
Barry Windham (as the Stalker): “Don’t ever believe your eyes. Because what you see may not be exactly what you think you see.”
Whispering Man: “Stalker…”