When OVW’s Chad and Tank Toland were called up to the Smackdown roster in 2005, they set their sights on various babyface tag teams…
…attacking both the Mexicools and the new Legion of Doom. Why? To make a name for themselves.
And that name was Dick.
Now dressed in suspenders, cuffs, bowties, and breakaway pants…
…the kayfabe brothers were re-christened Chad and James, The Dicks…
…a pair of Chippendales-type dancers with an affinity for baby oil.
To the surprise of no one, their name became fodder for the easiest of jokes:
- The Dicks “erupted” onto the tag team scene.
- The Dicks were great at poker because they “know when to hold ‘em”.
- Chad was the bigger Dick, James the smaller.
- The Dicks were, by their own admission, “cocky” because they were “rock hard”.
- “Nobody can beat The Dicks”, they bragged to backstage interviewer Steve Romero, who deserves credit for his deadpan delivery.
Chad & James weren’t afraid to get down and dirty…
…once spraying Road Warrior Animal in the eyes with their lotion to score a victory.
The gimmick was embarrassing, yes, but at least one of The Dicks realized that if he put his all into it, he could make the character work.
When no one in the WWE office believed in him, Chad Dick took the initiative to put his gimmick over the top. And boy did he pay for it.
In early 2006, Chad Dick decided that, if his team were supposed to be sexy male dancers…
…he had better learn how to sexy-male-dance.
And so, on his own time and his own dime, he practiced with a real-life male dancer who taught him the moves.
When word got around in the Smackdown locker room, The Undertaker and JBL put Chad on trial in the infamous Wrestlers’ Court. His offense? Doing gay stuff.
The Boys classified Chad as part of LGBTQ+ community (but not in those words), yelling slurs at him until he cried, which made him even more gay. And a bitch.
The Wrestlers’ Court then ordered him to fight his tag partner, which Chad refused, making him an even bigger bitch, in addition to being gay.
The following night at a house show, The Boys ribbed Chad, playing the sound of a baby crying over the speakers every time he got in the ring.
Then, having placed bets, they goaded Chad yet again into a fight with James in front of everyone, which he lost.
Chad, bloodied and knocked out, had earned the scorn of the locker room…
…while James, injured but victorious, had earned their respect.
Then they both got fired.
Unsurprisingly, Chad never worked in WWE again, but neither did James, despite being one of The Boys. Even if Smackdown’s locker room leaders had vouched for him (and they probably never did), there was simply no living down that Chippendales gimmick.
And besides, there were clearly too many Dicks in that locker room already.