Despite having a ton of it, I don’t keep much wrestling memorabilia out these days. I mean, I have wrestling magazines, videogames, albums, cards and tons more. Hulk Hogan Thunder Mixer? Of course. The original Katie Vick outfit? Yep, still have it. But again, very little on display. In fact, the sum and total of what I currently can look around the game room and see is pictured below:
Let’s see…we have a comic book style cover of the Death of WCW that someone did for the very first Starrcast, a Barnes & Noble poster for a book signing for the first WrestleCrap tome, a Nitro Grill shot glass, a trophy from the Big Cheese celebrating I believe 20 years of WrestleCrap, and a can of Stroh’s from Blade’s funeral. And smack dab in the middle? That there would be a Gobbledy Gooker custom action figure someone made for me years ago that is so detailed I never cease to shake my head in amazement when I see it.
The Gooker of course was the impetus in many ways for this site. I recall talking to my dear friend Merle one Monday night after Nitro and him telling me about something terrible he saw on the show, per his account it being “the worst thing ever on a wrestling show.” I immediately quipped “then you never saw the Gobbledy Gooker” and WrestleCrap was born. The Gooker was one of the very first every inductions, almost assuredly the very first one I ever wrote for the site. What’s funny is I am 99% sure in the original induction, I wrote that the Gooker disappeared following his Survivor Series debut and was never seen again.
Which was of course incorrect. He would appear many times after that in pre-taped promos, hanging out with the likes of The Bushwackers, Tugboat, Koko B. Ware and…(checks notes)…SABA SIMBA?? Holy crap, did these guys all lose a bet?
To be fair, it would be years before he was actually seen again, most notably in the Gimmick Battle Royal. The poor bird lasted less than a minute before being gently placed outside the ring.
Since that time, the Gooker had made sporadic appearances. We posted a pot luck dinner he attended a couple weeks back, and of course there was the time when Maryse put on the outfit and attacked Melina. I preferred it when she dressed up as Nikki Bella.
And of course there was the time yours truly put on the actual Gooker suit himself and hosted a Starrcast panel! Regardless, looking back at all this Gooker stuff reminds me…I don’t think we’ve ever inducted the time when the bird actually became a legitimate WWE champion. Time to correct that, and what better time than right before Thanksgiving?
To Survivor Series 2020 we go and…oh man, the Thunderdome. Wow that brings back some horrible memories. In hindsight I guess I have to applaud WWE for trying something to keep the fans involved, but looking at that now it’s so creepy and off putting. Anyway, we’re here on the pre-show and R-Truth is on the panel talking about his childhood hero, John Cena. As if that weren’t wacky enough, here comes your friend and mine, the Gobbledy Gooker! They dance about a bit (just like he did with Uncle Fred!!!)…
…and then does some mugging for the camera. Gotta love him fist bumping the co-hosts as JBL looks about like a total goon. I mean, even more than usual. Anyway, this is all fun and games until Akira Tozawa makes an appearance, and it’s blatantly obvious what he is after: the (not at all) coveted 24/7 championship that was held at the time by Truth. Truth assumes the attack position, ready for any type of action…
…when lo and behold, he is rolled up by none other than the Gooker himself! Yes, kids, put it in the record books – the Gobbledy Gooker was in fact a WWE Champion! And not in any wacky video game or animated show, in CANON baby.
And Truth seems even more shocked than any of us!
At this point, the Gooker was feeling pretty good about himself. Just look at him strutting backstage with his newly won gold. From laughing stock to champion. And it only took him 30 years to get there! Not only that, but it appears someone has left him a beautiful trail of bird seed, leading to a gigantic pile of tasty food. Everything’s coming up Gooker!
So our new champion begins to enjoy the fruits (well, seeds) of his labor and the celebration truly begins. Unfortunately, Tozawa sneaks out of a crate and rolls him up for the 1-2-3…and more importantly, the championship too. Awwww man. He really needed like a three month run there!
Of course, it doesn’t take long for Truth to appear once more, slamming a big bag of bird seed into the back of Tozawa’s head. And just like that, Truth was once more the 24/7 champion (for the 45th time apparently).
And then, just to be a total tool, he runs at the Gooker and tells him “Happy 30th anniversary!!!!” The Gooker runs after him, wings flapping and feet falling off along the way. Poor Gooky. You deserved better. Regardless, Happy Thanksgiving everyone!!