San Antonio, TX – Fans were shocked and dismayed as this past week’s Royal Rumble featured thirty different versions of Bray Wyatt. While some expected an updated version of the 3 Faces Of Foley at the 1998 Rumble, no one was prepared for what occurred.
This year’s Royal Rumble promised intrigue as there was no obvious winner or easy storyline progression. There was speculation that Sami Zayn would win and challenge Undisputed Champion Roman Reigns at Wrestlemania. Many hoped for a surprise entry from The Rock.
Despite already competing earlier in the night against LA Knight, Wyatt entered at number one. This allowed for his slow entrance and a darkened arena filled with lights. With the atmosphere set, fans erupted when Wyatt’s bizarre counterpart appeared as number two.
Fans eagerly counted down the next entrant only to be slightly confused when Huskus The Pig Boy ran down to the ring. The three characters slugged it out for two minutes until they were interrupted by The Fiend, another Wyatt personality.
Cheers eventually turned to groans as Mercy the Buzzard, Sister Abigail, Ramblin’ Rabbit, and a ‘Deleter Of Worlds’ version of Bray Wyatt joined the Rumble. Silence overtook the arena as all the Wyatt personalities and gimmicks waged a metaphorical battle over their avatar. Even a return of Nexus-era Husky Harris did nothing to pop the audience.
Interest did pick up at number 25 when Alexa Bliss’s music hit, but quickly died down when it was obviously Wyatt in a blonde wig.
Ultimately, the competition whittled down to a final four of Bray Wyatt, Bray Wyatt, Bray Wyatt, and Bray Wyatt. Unsurprisingly, Wyatt emerged the winner. Fans are hopeful his match against Roman Reigns is nothing like whatever it was that happened to John Cena at Wreslemania 36.