Someone Bought This: WWE HLA (Hot Lesbian Action) t-shirts- the very definition of “tacky”.

9 Submitted by on Mon, 22 July 2013, 00:00

HLA T-Shirt 1 WWF ShopHLA T-Shirt 2 WWF ShopHLA T-Shirt eBay

Crapper Pete Staiano found these two WWE HLA (Hot Lesbian Action) t-shirts from the early 2000’s on eBay, and on an old archived page.

This is an example of a catch phrase that never caught on, and I’m sure it’s something the modern day family-frinedly WWE hopes you don’t remember.

But that’s why we’re here, folks!

It was also a reference to something really lame they were trying to push on TV at the time…

It was their attempt to get viewers to tune in by occasionally featuring perfunctory, boring, PG-13 pseudo-lesbianism (like some of the most unsexy segments of Divas kissing each other that you’ve ever seen).

Plus there was the occasional “lesbian stalker” angle and some weird (so-called) flirting between the Divas from time to time meant to excite the audience.

It failed spectacularly because anyone who wants to see actual lesbians (or at least, two straight girls doing a decent job of faking it) can see it any time they want to through various means, and they know WWE television won’t show anything beyond some contrived, forced kissing that looked about as sexy as two carp going after the same piece of bait.

So, let’s review:

1. It’s not “hot” (unless maybe you’re about 12 years old just entering puberty and you’d get turned on by just about anything- like a jar of peanut butter).

2. The girls clearly aren’t lesbians.

3. And there’s really no “action” because it’s airing on basic cable (well, with the exception of that horrible WWE/Girls Gone Wild Pay-Per-View, but let’s not speak of that abomination…).

Leave it to the WWF to ruin the concept of lesbian porn in their attempt to be edgy.

Besides, who would wear either of these shirts out in public? Especially the “licking box” one?! Gah…  I wouldn’t wear that if the WWE paid me.

The “HLA” one isn’t really any better despite being slightly more subtle in it’s tastelessness.

They’re some of the most embarrassing wrestling t-shirts I’ve ever seen- right up there with the “A.P.A: Always Pounding Ass” one.

Anyway, thanks for the submission, Pete.

Do any of you Crappers own one of these shirts (and you’re brave enough to admit it) or know someone who did/does?

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9 Responses to "Someone Bought This: WWE HLA (Hot Lesbian Action) t-shirts- the very definition of “tacky”."
  1. Sir Thomas says:

    Wow, they actually made T-shirts for that? And here I thought it was just another set up for 3 Minute Warning.

  2. kmtown says:

    Has anyone ever seen John Cena’s AWA style “HLR” shirts from a few years back? I think a lot of people thought they said “HLA”…

    • CBCB says:

      If Cena’s shirts did say “HLA”, it’d have been fitting if they mentioned the “Five Knuckle Shuffle” on the back…

  3. Art0Donnell says:

    One of these days I’ll work up the nerve to induct HLA into Wrestlecrap. How it has eluded this site for so long is a mystery, except for the fact that it was eclipsed by the necrophilia angle that took place the month after.

    • John says:

      The problem with inducting it would be it was more boring than crappy. You can just see Vince proudly saying to the stooges, “Now this will get us some controversy” No it was just like a bad Married with Children episode without a laugh track.

  4. Thomas Moffatt says:

    You missed out the worst bit – it resulted in a stipulation where Nipple H had to have HLA but didn’t… Classic Induction me thinks…

  5. Stephen says:

    You know the optical illusion of two faces in opposite directions, with a vase in the middle of them? Why am I seeing Caduceus, the symbol of the medical profession, in between the two “lesbians”?

  6. 80's Guy says:

    I never saw the licking box one. That’s pretty crazy right there. Not much in the subtlety department, that’s for sure.

    The other one, though? That one isn’t too bad. I’d wear that out to the bar or something. The design itself isn’t that bad, it’s actually pretty cool barring what spawned it.

    Somebody send me one, and I’ll take pics of myself wearing it when I’m out on the town.

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