Re-writing The Book – State of the union address

16 Submitted by on Sun, 15 December 2013, 14:29

Howdy. Long time no … anything, I guess.

And for that, I need to apologize. I should’ve popped my head up sooner and given you all the low-down. Hope you all aren’t too mad at me.

So, it’s been a while since RTB has had any new product, and I’m sure a lot of you are thinking it’s recent dormancy is really a fade into the sunset. That couldn’t be further from the truth. Those of you who’ve followed this column’s life, from it’s birth two websites ago to it’s long-time (and forever) residence here at the ‘Crap know it’s had some fallow periods. This is not out of the ordinary. But the confluence of circumstances that have created the latest dry spell have been just downright spooky in their synchronicity. CG has had some personal issues to deal with; Shane has had some health issues, as well as other projects he’s working on; not sure what’s keeping Ari from his debut column, and Henrik has disappeared. All in all, sounds like bad news, right?

Not so fast. And this is where it gets good.

Not too long ago, CG told me he’s finally gotten the time to start work on a new column.

And Shane’s on the mend, so I believe he’s looking towards a new column as well.

And a friend from another website is looking to write an edition of it, and if he manages to stop procrastinating and finish it off, he’ll see some Wrestlecrap ink.

And hey, here’s a shock … remember Simon Rawls? Well, don’t call it a comeback, cause he’s been … okay, call it a comeback, because that’ what it is! He’s looking to write a new edition of the column!

Now, I don’t know how far into it these guys are, or how long their next columns look to be. Maybe they’re one-shots, maybe they’re epic, multi-part mini-series. I’ve been given scant few details besides basic concepts, and the last thing I’m doing is spoiling those. I’m also not jinxing it by promising, or even guessing, dates. They didn’t offer, and I’m not going to put a date out there and have it whizz by with nothing to show for it.

So … there you have it. The column’s not dead. Just in one of those dry spells. Don’t worry, it’ll rain soon.

Happy holidays to you all. Much love and thank you for your continued suppor–

Oh, wait. I forgot one thing.

This past summer – July, I believe, to be exact- marked the 10th anniversary of this column’s birth. From 411 to Inside Pulse to the ‘Crap, through my first hiatus after the birth my twins, a semi-sorta-mostly retirement, my late podcast of many names, passing the torch … this column’s seen a lot in 10 years. I may not be proud of all the columns I myself wrote, but the feedback from you, the loyal readers, as well as the support and friendship of guys like RD, Blade and everybody that’s been and gone during my tenure … it’s meant the world to me. I still maintain that any writer who doesn’t do it for his or her own pleasure first should find a new hobby (or profession, if you manage to make a buck off it0, but I’ll be a damned liar if I said the appreciation and kindness and loyalty of you guys doesn’t count for anything. It does. It counts for a lot. The email I got from an MP at a military base in Germany who said RTB made his midnight shifts a lot less boring … having somehow been an inspiration to 411’s Mathew Sforcina and former RTB writer (but forever ‘Crap family member) Neil Cathan … that’s the kind of recompense you can’t buy, and all the episodes of writer’s block, stressing over meeting my own quality standards, it makes it all worthwhile. I owe you guys, for 10 years of appreciation and readership. And I intend to pay you back, and in doing so commemorate 10 years of RTB in style. How, you ask?

By making a comeback of my own.

Yes, you read that right. It’s not a full-time comeback. I don’t have the time for that. But inspiration has struck, and I’m halfway through a new edition, my first in … umm … somebody help me out. Four years? It’s a corker, and it’s sure to be my most controversial edition, for reasons you’ll find out when you read it. It’ll be done in the non-kayfabe style that the DX/Nitro story was done in, and it will answer the question: “What if Goldberg didn’t lose at Starrcade ’98?”.

And given how hot it feels and how much the story wants to be written (it’s driving me, at this point), I have every reason to believe you’ll see it by the end of January, and likely a lot sooner. It’ll be a five-parter: four parts covering the actual story, and a special fifth edition where I answer questions and comments, and give you a behind-the-scenes. I’ll need your help with that one, obviously, so please don’t hesitate to leave comments or shoot me emails. As long as they’re not rude or obscene, I’ll include as many as I can.

So, there ya go. That’s RTB as we knock on 2014’s door. I hope I’ve allayed fears, and I’m sure I’ve also sparked interest. Again, thank you for your patience and support. You’ve made the past 10 years awesome, for me and everybody else who’s put their time and energy into RTB. Can’t wait to see what you all think of the new column … see ya in a few weeks!


Written by

Guilty of creating Rewriting The Book and The Greatest Night In The History Of Our Sport, and publishing them somewhat infrequently. Father of three, husband, avid gamer, lover of 90's MTV animation. Available for podcasts and children's birthdays at
16 Responses to "Re-writing The Book – State of the union address"
  1. "The Big Cheese" Paul Kraft says:

    Hooray! Thanks for the update, Jed.

  2. Autrach Sejanoz says:

    Allright! Great news! Looking forward to the new stories!

  3. Porter "Budsgrand" Sultzbuagh says:

    Thank you kindly for the update, myself and a co-worker or teo love the stories. I print them up upon stories end and keep them in a 3 ring binder.


    Lord forbid, Wrestlecrap is kind of a hobby for me.

    • Jed Shaffer says:

      Then get your printer ready and a ream of fresh paper. The new story’s gonna be a big’un. I thought it’d be simple, but it keeps growing and growing, like a literary batch of sea monkeys.

  4. Bender says:

    RTB is what first drew me to this site. Three book purchases and untold laughs later, it’s now become as much of a weekly ritual as Sunday lunch with the family and laundry. Can’t wait for the new ones. I would assume no one is looking for suggestions, but if anyone could ever do a “if anyone but Paul “the wwf job guy” Roma became the new Horseman in ’93 piece I would be willing to commission it.

  5. hulk6785 says:

    So, the Hulk Hogan/AWA story will finally be concluded!?

    I kid, I kid. I’m seriously glad this feature is coming back.

  6. drunkenmaster says:

    At last someone’s doing a “What if…?” on Goldberg’s career. I think he’s a little underestimated. Some people don’t realize how his WCW failure wasn’t his fault, but rather the company’s own fault. Just my opinion, though…

  7. Marvelous says:

    I’ll be glad if it’s true but I can’t really put any stock in something that’s promised for rewriting the book anymore after the total lack or content over the last ones. I’m sorry if personal issues got in the way of it but if the site administrators allowed a post to go up guaranteeing content then ignored the issue when content wasn’t delivered (a simple ‘hey guys sorry about that. Something came up so these won’t be happening’ from anyone would have done fine) then I doubt this will be any different

    • "The Big Cheese" Paul Kraft says:

      We all have lives, and sometimes our real life issues get in the way of writing for the site. Remember that everyone who writes for WrestleCrap is doing it on a volunteer basis just for fun. There’s plenty of other great stuff to enjoy on the site while you wait for new RTB content. 🙂

      • Marvelous says:

        I’m not saying that I demand new content for rtb or I’m out, nor am I blaming any authors for being alive and living said life. I’m just saying that when things go unaddressed like that by administrators it doesn’t exactly make me want to start reading a new one when it simply won’t be finished without any word other than “we have lives”. And it certainly doesn’t make me open the old wallet when the posts begging for money go up.

        • Jed Shaffer says:

          If you’re referring to Shane’s Hogan/AWA arc … well, without going into personal detail, his health issues were thought to be dealt with, then re-occured. I believe the comments were made in that period between. There was no way of knowing life would get in the way again. So, please don’t hold it against Shane.

          As for not communicating what was going on from a “site administrator” level, first, I need to clear up one thing: as far as RTB goes, I’m the administrator. RD has been more than gracious enough to let me run with autonomy, more or less, so when it comes to blame, please don’t direct it at him, or Blade, or Justin, or Paul, or anybody else. The failure to communicate prior to now falls on one man, and that’s me. And for that I’m sorry. Do I have reasons for dropping out of sight? Yes; my toddler was hospitalized 3 times in 2 months over the summer. It’s been a very trying year personally. That doesn’t excuse me not popping in for five minutes to drop off a quick message … just gives an explanation. I sort of left online interaction behind for a while, and in the process, I sorta forgot about the ‘Crap community. All my fault. Again, I’m sorry. I can’t apologize enough for not being in better contact with you all.

          And please don’t let this effect how you feel about the rest of the site and when sales occur or pledge drives happen. Art, Justin, Paul, everybody … they all work their butts off, and all for the love of doing it, and RD has built us a wonderful playground in which to have fun. My failure as RTB editor and overlord shouldn’t be taken out on the rest of the crew, and the operations of the site as a whole. Not that you owe financial support … I’m just saying, if the thought has crossed your mind to buy or donate, don’t let my slip-ups be the fulcrum on which the decision balances.

          And as for the new column, the reason it won’t go up until January is that I won’t publish until the whole thing is done, so I can guarantee no loose ends. The only thing that may prevent this story from going up in the time I stated is that it keeps getting longer with every chapter. I’m at 30 or so single-spaced pages, and I’m just over the half-way point. If there’s a delay, this time, I’ll let you all know in a timely manner. But at the rate this thing is flying off my fingertips, I don’t see that happening. This story wants to be told. Hell, it was whirring in my brain so much last night, I couldn’t get to sleep.

          So, I hope this allayed any fears, and cleared up any issues you might have with the column or the site.

  8. Joshua Scribner says:

    Glad to hear about the return of RTB. Always a good and interesting read. I noticed you said CG was working on a new column, is it in reference to his story about Bret Hart leaving on good terms with WWE in 1997?

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