Text by Justin Henry, RD Reynolds, and Sean Carless; Photoshoppery by Sean Carless and RD Reynolds
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WWE TO POSTHUMOUSLY INDUCT MATT HARDY INTO HALL OF FAME
By Justin Henry
Stamford, CT – Despite the notion that World Wrestling Entertainment was set having six separate inductions for the 2012 Hall of Fame class, an amendment was made this week, at the request of the class’ headliner.
Adam Copeland, professionally known as Edge, has personally lobbied to Vince McMahon to induct the late Matt Hardy into the 2012 class, and McMahon has acquiesced.
“This induction meant a lot to Mr. Copeland, so much so that we’re changing our promotional materials as we speak,” said Rose Marie Harmon, WWE publicist. “It was certainly a difficult loss, one that we’re still coming to grips with on its exact nature and time, and it’s our honor to meet Adam’s request.”
Hardy, who passed away at some indeterminable point in 2010, was a respected member of the World Wrestling Entertainment roster. In the time after his death, an irrational, self-indulgent man with an ample beer gut and laughable dreadlocks began impersonating him on a series of viral videos. Said individual, who has never been indentified, ran afoul of the law several times, including a very public alcohol-related car accident in August 2011.
Adam Copeland doesn’t want his old friend-turned-professional rival to be remembered by actions of such a deluded, insane individual.
“Matt and I didn’t always see eye to eye, thanks mostly to actions on my part,” said a morose Copeland. “But the man had such a gift for putting matches together, and getting the most out of even the clumsiest of opponents. I sure wish he was still around; I miss his articulacy, his brilliance. I also wish TNA didn’t help sully his reputation by bringing that oafish impostor in. That really did Matt no favors.”
Amy “Lita” Dumas will provide the induction for Hardy. Copeland says he wishes he could induct his friend, but will gladly do one down the line for whichever Ultimate Warrior is apparently dead.