Louisville, KY – During a live event at Freedom Hall in Louisville, WWE Superstar and former Intercontinental Champion Santino Marella announced his retirement to the local crowd. Forgoing his usual Italian accent and comedic walk, Marella addressed the crowd in a serious manner, mentioning his various neck injuries. The heartfelt speech was interrupted by former WWE, NWA, TNA, ROH, and Smokey Mountain Wrestling star, Jim Cornette.
Fans were shocked to see the legendary manager come through the crowd, gingerly hop over the guardrail, and enter the ring to confront Marella. Cornette grabbed the microphone from Marella mid-sentence, yelling “I’ve got five words for you, Santino: ‘Are you freaking kidding me?’ I was doing my podcast ‘The Jim Cornette Experience’ on MLW.com high atop Castle Cornette and I just knew that there was something wrong with the pro wrestling Force. Call it a seventh sense. The sixth being knowing when Vince Russo is about to royally screw something up. You’ve been in this business how long and now of all times you break character? This is professional wrestling, not your coming out party.”
As Marella began to protest, Cornette slapped him across the face, drawing a loud gasp from the crowd.
“What are you gunna to do about that, Santina?” said Cornette, referencing Marella’s cross-dressing character from several years ago. “You’re gunna tell me you’re just plain old Anthony Carelli from freaking Mississauga, Ontario now? Are you just going to eat some donuts and watch ‘Saturday Night in Canada’? You gunna start saying ‘aboot’ and ‘sorry’ now? You might as well just piss on Brusier Brody’s grave while you’re at it. Make sure you squat down real low before you do it, Santina. Wouldn’t want you to ruin your dress. Stop trying to feed these people a pound of bullshit with a teaspoon, you dumbass!”
Cornette then slapped Marella across the face again.
“Well, I do declare, Mr. Cornette, I believe I have the vapors,” said Marella in a southern accent.
Bewildered, Cornette slapped Marella again.
“Crikey, mate. I feel like a bloomin’ onion after a dingo’s been at it,” said Marella in an Australian accent.
Incredulous, Cornette slapped Marella a fourth time.
“Mama mia!” exclaimed Marella. “It’s-a me, Santino Marella. I give-a you dah Cobra and have-a the nice pizza pie.”
“That’s better,” said Cornette. “Now do your stupid little constipated walk out of here before my hands get too tired.”