Category Archives: Someone Bought This

Obscure, strange, and sometimes downright horrible wrestling merchandise that someone paid good money to obtain.

Someone Bought This: Terrifying Captain Lou Albano caricature shirt

2 Submitted by on Fri, 13 September 2019, 02:00
From 1986 it’s the Captain Lou Albano caricature shirt.. GAH! That is horrifying! He looks like a deranged, possessed Cabbage Patch Kids doll trying to kill someone in a horror movie! And for some reason, whoever drew this decided to put him in a suit better suited (see what I did there?) for Ted DiBiase. Let’s take a look at the definition Continue Reading...
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Someone Bought This: Tatanka! Tie-Dye!

3 Submitted by on Fri, 06 September 2019, 02:00
It’s a tie-dye (?!) Tatanka shirt! It seems really weird that there’s a tie-dye shirt for Tatanka of all people. Is he secretly a hippie Indian? Aren’t tie-dye shirts supposed to be vibrant and colorful? You know, like this one! Tatiana’s Tie-Dye shirt is just sad and boring! Between the black and white picture of Tatanka and the muted, dark colors, this Continue Reading...
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Someone Bought This: Steve Austin “Bad To The Bonz” shirt

1 Submitted by on Fri, 30 August 2019, 02:00
  Here’s the Stone Cold Steve Austin “Bad To The Bonz” shirt. “Bonz”?! Is that pronounced “Bons” like “Bon-Bons”? Oh! They mean “bones”! Because spelling things wrong is cool! I know that’s supposed to be a rattlesnake skeleton, but it really just looks like a magnified sperm to me. “Spermy 3:16 says I just fertilized your egg!” “Aw, what a wastesk Continue Reading...
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Someone Bought This: WCW Erasable Pens help you fix-up your mix-ups!

5 Submitted by on Fri, 23 August 2019, 02:00
Let’s face it, if you’re booking WCW in the late 90’s, odds are you’re making a lot of mistakes! So you probably don’t want to use a proper ink pen to write out the weekly booking. Fortunately for you, we have this pair of erasable pens featuring Bill Goldberg and Kevin Nash. So when you change your booking plans an hour before Continue Reading...
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Someone Bought This: Make Hulk Hogan fly to amuse your dog

5 Submitted by on Fri, 16 August 2019, 02:00
It’s a Hulk Hogan Frisbee! Oh, wait no…  I’m sorry- “Frisbee” is the legally protected trademark of some other company. This is a Hulk Hogan “Radical Flying Disc”. Whoa! it’s radical, dudes! Please don’t sue me, Frisbee people. It’s not my fault your products aren’t radical. I like that it advertises you can “Do tricks and stunts” with your dog Continue Reading...
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Someone Bought This: A Disco Inferno shirt? Yeah, Yeah, Yeah, Yeah!

3 Submitted by on Fri, 09 August 2019, 02:00
Yes, Disco Inferno got his own shirt. Okay, I guess that makes sense- he was pretty over with the crowds at one point. But that was mostly because of his awesome theme song more than anything else. I think I preferred him as a one-note John Travolta ripoff rather than the uber-annoying clueless “white guy pretending to be street” schmuck gimmick Continue Reading...
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Someone Bought This: He rides a motorcycle?

4 Submitted by on Fri, 02 August 2019, 02:00
It’s Kane! And he’s… on a motorcycle? Okay, I suppose that looks cool, but I don’t remember ever seeing Kane on a motorcycle on TV before. Maybe he took lessons with Paul Bearer after he killed The Undertaker’s parents? Or maybe The Undertaker decided to be the bigger man and teach him how to ride! They also released figures of Continue Reading...
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Someone Bought This: Hasbro shows a little skin(ner)

4 Submitted by on Fri, 26 July 2019, 02:00
All right! It’s an action figure of Skinner! I just love that someone at WWE and someone at Hasbro came together and collectively decided that “Yes! We need to make an action figure of Steve Kern as swamp-dwelling Skinner! The kids will love it!”. In case you’re wondering, the “Gator Breaker” move they so proudly advertise on the package is where Continue Reading...
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Someone Bought This: WWF Attitude “Show Me Your Puppies” shirt (sigh…)

5 Submitted by on Fri, 05 July 2019, 02:00
  This is a fine example of the worst of the worst of the “edgy” Attitude Era merchandise. Jerry Lawler loved to Oogle the Divas and got way, way too excited by their breasts. Or, as he called them “puppies”. In a really annoying, screechy, way-too-excited voice. And he’d call them that again and again and again… WWE decided to Continue Reading...
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Someone Bought This: “The Rock Says…”? Not really.

10 Submitted by on Fri, 21 June 2019, 02:00
This is The Rock’s 2000 autobiography “The Rock Says…”. It’s one of the worst wrestling autobiographies eve released for two simple reasons: First, unlike Mick Foley’s excellent autobiographies, The Rock’s book was mostly written by Joe Layden with very little actual involvement from The Rock. Secondly, it came out on January 1st, 2000. The Rock had only been in WWE for Continue Reading...
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Someone Bought This: The NWO will destroy WCW with a Cyborg!

7 Submitted by on Fri, 14 June 2019, 02:00
Remember Cyborg? You know, the NWO member? What do you mean “No”?! Well, all I can tell you is that apparently Cyborg was a wrestler from Brazil. So I guess he was in the NWO’s Brazilian offshoot? Man, that’s worse than being in the lame NWO B-Team with Vincent and Scott Norton. And yes, I know that isn’t Hollywood Hogan there. These Continue Reading...
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Someone Bought This: Hulk Hogan baseball glove, WWF Coloring Books, and the WWF Makeup Kit!

6 Submitted by on Fri, 07 June 2019, 02:00
If you showed up for Little League practice with this Hulk Hogan baseball glove, then you deserved to be pantsed in front of the entire team and coaching staff. But that’s not all they’re hawking on this catalog page! Look! The Official WWF Makeup Kit, so you can look like The Legion Of Doom, or The Ultimate Warrior, or.. um… Continue Reading...
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Someone Bought This: It’s more than a lollipop- it’s a Stone Cold Spin Pop!

6 Submitted by on Fri, 31 May 2019, 02:00
Say “Hello” to the Stone Cold Steve Austin Spin Pop. It’s basically a plastic figure of ol’ Steve covering a lollipop (or sucker, if you prefer) that spins around when you press a button on the handle. Because apparently spinning a candy around via a little motor makes it taste better? So let’s review: Stone Cold cover + lollipop + spinning Continue Reading...
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Someone Bought This: Oh, a Wise Guy, eh?

6 Submitted by on Fri, 24 May 2019, 02:00
In the late 90’s at the height of D-Generation X’s popularity, they decided to release the DX Wiseguyz– a set of figures featuring Triple H, The New Age Outlaws, and X-Pac dressed up as as 1930’s gangsters. They even put them on the cover of WWF Magazine in suits! Um… Why? I mean DX was cool. Gangsters are always cool. Continue Reading...
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Someone Bought This: This Rockers shirt reminds me of something…

5 Submitted by on Fri, 10 May 2019, 02:00
I especially like this Rockers shirt because it looks like the Title Card to a wacky 80’s cartoon- “The Adventures Of The Rockers”! You expect them to team up with the Scooby-Doo gang solving mysteries in a van, and then they’d all dance to some generic rock music at the end. I bet Shawn would totally score with Daphnie, leaving Continue Reading...
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Someone Bought This: Mankind is here with Chef Boyardee Ravioli!

0 Submitted by on Fri, 03 May 2019, 02:00
This was too weird not to uh.. “borrow” for SBT, Crappers! User dgnr8 on The Wrestling Figs collector’s forum made a post in this thread about all the promotional cardboard cutout standees he owns, including this one! It’s a promotional standee of Mick Foley / Mankind shilling for Chef Boyardee Beef Ravioli! Imagine that you’re staying overnight at this guy’s Continue Reading...
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Someone Bought This: Cutting hair is thirsty work!

1 Submitted by on Fri, 26 April 2019, 02:00
  It’s a Brutus “The Barber” Beefcake drinking glass! Brutus is looking kind of bloated here, isn’t he? Of course, the only thing you can really drink out of it are those fruity mixed drinks with the little paper umbrellas. “Ooo! I sure could usk one of those drinks from that glass featuring that sexy barber fella, there…” That’s enough out Continue Reading...
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Someone Bought This: Sting’s in trouble, but help is on the way!

4 Submitted by on Fri, 19 April 2019, 02:00
Robocop in WCW was pretty ridiculous on it’s own merits (of course we’ve covered that in The WrestleCrap Archives) but even moe ridiculous is the over-the-top (dad!) ad copy they came up with for this Capital Combat ’90 ad. For extra fun, read it in your best “Movie Trailer Voice-Over Guy” voice as if it’s the most important thing in the Continue Reading...
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Someone Bought This: WCW luggage tags will help make you look stupid in public

5 Submitted by on Fri, 12 April 2019, 02:00
They actually made WCW Sting and Goldberg luggage tags. Okay, picture this. You’re at the airport baggage carousel… …desperately trying to find your suitcase amongst the dozens circling by. You walk up to an airline employee and say “Excuse me, can you help me find my bag? It’s the black one with the luggage tag of a mime on it!”. Continue Reading...
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Someone Bought This: This shirt is unbelievable… for all the wrong reasons

5 Submitted by on Fri, 05 April 2019, 02:00
“Unbelievable!” (said in Vince McMahon’s awesome bombastic voice) was WWE’s slogan during the failed “New Generation” era where they trotted out a bunch of new wrestlers and characters that nobody cared about. “Unbelievable”… as in “I can’t believe how terrible the WWF is these days”. And for some reason they decided to put the slogan on a shirt in unbelievably Continue Reading...
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Someone Bought This: Custom Man Mountain Rock figure with the most important accessory

0 Submitted by on Fri, 08 March 2019, 02:00
I found this custom Man Mountain Rock figure at WrestleToys.com. It’s better than the Hasbro custom one we featured earlier because this one does come with WWF logo guitar as illustrated! But sadly no crown. King Man Mountain Rock! Oh, what a wonderful world it would be if he had been crowned King of the WWF! Man Mountain Rock, what do Continue Reading...
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