Jordan Mishkin, Author at WrestleCrap - The Very Worst of Pro Wrestling! Archive | WrestleCrap

Headlies: Fan Regrets Wishing For More Wrestling On A Monkey’s Paw

1 Submitted by Jordan Mishkin on Mon, 20 January 2020, 08:00

Duluth, MN – Diehard wrestling fan Henry Peterson now regrets wishing for more pro wrestling on a magical monkey’s paw. Peterson, who purchased the cursed object from a mysterious old man at a market in Marakesh, was unaware of its power. “At first, I didn’t really think much of it,” said Peterson, bathed in the warm glow of his television Continue Reading...

Headlies: Excalibur Removes His Mask, Terrifying AEW Employees

6 Submitted by Jordan Mishkin on Mon, 13 January 2020, 08:00

Miami, FL – All Elite Wrestling announcer Excalibur removed his mask at a company meeting this morning, terrifying and sickening his fellow employees. The former wrestler, who still wears his luchadore-style mask while calling AEW matches, addressed the group. “I’d given a lot of thought to what Brandi Rhodes said to me on last week’s show,” said Excalibur. “Ultimately, she’s Continue Reading...

Headlies: Rusev – Lana – Lashley – Liv Angle To Now Include Literal Car Wrecks

4 Submitted by Jordan Mishkin on Mon, 06 January 2020, 08:00

Oklahoma City, OK – After seeing the ratings success of the Lashley – Lana wedding on the last Monday Night Raw of 2019, Vince McMahon has demanded that actual car accidents be included in storyline. The decision came Monday morning during the creative team’s weekly meeting. “We need something big! Huge! Something that will force the WWE Universe to keep Continue Reading...

Headlies: Otis Dozovic To Be Dropped At Midnight On New Year’s Eve

1 Submitted by Jordan Mishkin on Mon, 30 December 2019, 08:00

New York, NY – Times Square New Year’s Eve organizers have announced that WWE Superstar Otis Dizovic will be replacing the traditional ball dropped at midnight. “We are incredibly excited to have Mr. Dozovic joining us,” said Times Square event organizer Belinda Accoune. “Fans were very excited when we revealed that Roman Reigns was going to have a wrestling match. Continue Reading...

Headlies: Bray Wyatt To Celebrate Christmas With The Miz’s Family

3 Submitted by Jordan Mishkin on Mon, 23 December 2019, 08:00

Thousand Oaks, CA – Following his triumphant win at TLC, Bray Wyatt will now be spending Christmas with The Miz’s family. Per the terms of their match at the most recent Pay-Per-View, WWE Universal Champion will now be celebrating the holidays with Miz’s wife Maryse and their children Madison and Monroe. Miz, who stated it was the most important match Continue Reading...